The Search for Joy

On the eve of a glorious Easter Sunday in 2009, I find myself thinking about the word joy.

Joy is often spoken of in church, referenced in scripture, and is actually one of the Fruits of the Spirit. As a believer in Christ, I was told that joy is all part of the package deal when accepting Jesus as your Lord and Savior. So, when I recommitted my life to Him, I spread my arms wide and waited for the joy. I couldn't wait for the joy because then I could smear it on every part of my life like butter. Having joy would make everything feel better. But when the joyful feelings didn't come and stay, I figured I must have done something wrong...right?

I've spent the last few years trying to acquire and maintain the joy so eagerly promised to me. I figured once I spent more time in the Word, praying, and serving others that it would surely return. And it did...for awhile. I figured once I began truly trusting the Lord with my finances by obediently tithing it would surely return. And it did...for awhile. I figured once He blessed me with the love of my life it would surely return. And it did...for awhile. The process continued like the ebb and flow of the sea but without the benefit of the moon's steady pattern. Would I ever get that joyful feeling and keep it? The answer to this question eluded me until a couple of weeks ago.

After I posted my last blog, I was having serious trouble falling asleep that night. I was lying awake in bed when, suddenly, I could hear the Lord speaking to me. It wasn't the voice that spoke to Charlton Heston playing Moses on Mt. Sinai but it was words that kept repeating in my head. I began to mouth them so I wouldn't wake my husband. I repeated them a few times before realizing it was a prayer about joy. The prayer was about letting the Spirit flow through us so we can worship our God with all of our being, without inhibitions. By doing that, the joy in our hearts can overflow, pouring out to those around us and up to Heaven itself. That's when He revealed to me from where our joy should come.

Our joy should come from knowing we can have a close, personal relationship with the Creator of the universe...the Creator of EVERYTHING.
Our joy should come from knowing we have a Daddy in Heaven who loves us so much that He sacrificed His ONLY Son to erase ALL of our sins.
Our joy should come from knowing Jesus came and faithfully fulfilled His mission, even to bloodshed and death on the cross.
Our joy should come from knowing Jesus Christ conquered death and the grave so we can live forever with our Father in Heaven. Our Redeemer lives!

Wow. And that's when it really hit me. All these years I was searching for a feeling. Joy is like love and forgiveness. They are not feelings. They are choices. They are actions. When we choose to truly love someone, it means we still love them even when we don't feel like it. When we choose to truly forgive someone, it means we don't wait for a feeling of relief...we just let go of the bitterness and resentment. And when we choose to have true joy in our lives, it means that we don't allow our roller coaster of emotions to rule the roost. We choose to joyfully steer through the waters of life, both stormy and calm, knowing the price has been paid and our future is secure.

Is my life perfect? Will I never experience troubled times or hardships? Absolutely not. I don't know all this life has in store for me but I do know it's temporary. Fortune, fame, and feelings are all fleeting, so I'm going to choose the eternal gift...I choose joy.